Dad vs. The Thin Green Mile

presented by j:

alright, we’ve got to get back on track with blogging – it’s been hard to remember it over the past few weeks.  so with no more further ado…

i love my dad for many reasons.  he’s good at a number of things, including fixing up cars and singing.  there are certain things, however, we all wish he was better at.  for example, remembering movie titles.

now, dad likes movies a lot, and we’ve gone to go see quite a few together over the years, but he just gets really mixed-up with them sometimes.  there was the time, i was sitting in the living room watching The Green Mile, and he walked in.  he sees Tom Hanks on the screen and feels inquisitive about it:

Dad:  “Oh, is this the, uh, the…The Thin Green Mile?”

Me: “…do you mean The Thin Red Line or The Green Mile?”

that is not the worst, though.  he finds ever-new, more inventive ways to confuse titles, like in the summer of 2003:

Dad:  “Say, what’s that new Disney movie coming about about the fish?  Hunting For Milo?*

Me: “…”

Dad:  “Isn’t that what it’s called?”

Me:  “It’s called Finding Nemo.”

Dad:  “Oh, well…close enough.”

*Hunting For Milo…see this and that.

i thought he had steadily gotten better at this, until a recent conversation we had:

Dad:  “Oh…and we LOVED Twisted.”

Everyone at the Table: “…”

Me:  “What are you talking about?”

Dad:  “You know…the princess with all the hair.”

Me:  “…Tangled?”*

Dad:  “Tangled, twisted, whatever…you knew what I meant.”

Me:  “No, actually, we didn’t.”

My sister:  [facepalm]

*speaking of, it’s out on DVD today, so check it out if you haven’t already.

another thing i love about my dad/family are random texts like these (received on Thursday last):

Text 1:  “ll of y’all”

Text 2:  “I just thought I would let all of you know that I’m having a MRI on my back and x-rays on my left foot tomorrow morning in longview.  please pray.  love a”

my dad is one of the worst at answering his cell phone.  i don’t even know why he carries it half of the time.  i distinctly remember one time where i had tried to call him several times and he never answered.  this was the conversation that occurred later when I saw him:

Me:  “I tried to call you earlier but you didn’t answer.”

Dad:  “I know.  I was at a funeral.  It rang just as the casket was in front of me.”

Me:  “Oh, sorry…wait…why didn’t you just have it on silent since you were at a funeral?”

Dad:  “Because…well, sometimes when it buzzes, I just think it’s gas.”

Me:  “…is your gas that rhythmic?”

Dad:  “Sometimes.”

in the end, though, there are certainly much worse mistakes to be made in life.  it makes me wonder what things i will do that my kids will post blogs about one day…they’ll probably be in 4-D or something when that time comes.  it’ll probably be about how i don’t trust national teleport tranit or keep breaking my holographic phone.

i’m still waiting for those self-lacing shoes we were promised here, though.

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